Sunday, April 29, 2007

A Magic Formula For Guaranteed Weight Loss.

That grabbed your attention didn't it? I have a "Magic Formula for Guaranteed Weight Loss." Well, are you waiting? I swear I do. I absolutely promise it will work.

This formula will make you thin as a rail. When you get this formula you will jump with exuberant joy. This will turn the world on it's head. Preponderant people everywhere will no longer be preponderant. There will be no more need for another diet pill. There won't be any need to read one more diet book.

If you use this formula, I guarantee you'll shed all the pounds that you will ever need to shed. This formula threatens to end the monopoly of the South Beach Diet. There won't be any more diet clinics anywhere. This is it. It's the end of the misery of bloated britches. Oprah Winfrey here comes the answer to your problems dear.

All you girls out there that want to have a small figure I have the formula. I mean it. You'll be able to wear that size six, and not ever again that size twelve.

Are you ready for my guaranteed formula? Are you on the edge of your chair? I can see it now, you're thin. Get ready. Here it comes. I have the answer. This formula will take your breath away. People everywhere will say why didn't I think of that? I mean it. It's coming. I am about to reveal the formula.

Are you ready? Here it comes. This formula will change your world like it has for millions of people before you. Get ready.

OK here it is. This will Rock your World.

EAT LESS FOOD.

That's it. That's the formula. David you swindler. I thought you were going to guarantee I was going to be thin. Well, I did. I do. I am 36 pounds lighter than I was in December of 2006 with that formula. I guarantee it works.

This morning I was talking to a friend of mine. I told him that I am now 36 pounds less than I was. He seemed to be amazed. He asked me what my secret was. I told him what I wrote up there. He asked me a bunch of questions. I answered them. He didn't like the answers. He didn't want to hear that he is going to feel hunger. No body does.

Hunger is a big stumbling block to getting off the pounds. I didn't like it. I still don't like it.

Simply put, hunger is the bodies way of saying, "Hey I need energy, and I need it now." This is normal to get hungry. I would worry for you if you never felt hunger. Then there just might be something physically wrong with someone.

The problem with many preponderant people is they have never trained themselves to deal with hunger.

We live in a world where food is readily available. It's easy to grab something and eat it. This we usually do without thinking about it. Since there is such an abundant supply of many different foods we can pretty much eat what ever fits our fancy at the moment. Here in lays the problem. We fit our fancy, and we satisfy our hunger any way that we wish.

Then we go happily to the next time when we carefully pick our next nutritional meal. NOT! Many years later after satisfying our hunger and fitting our fancy we wake up to find that those clothes we used to wear are real tight now. I did.

It never occurs to us that we don't eat properly until it's to late. Then when we have become preponderant we throw in the towel. We make excuses for the added pounds. Then when we become seriously ill, like becoming a diabetic, we make the changes necessary. It's too late then. The damage will have been done.

I have three close family members who are now type two diabetics. One got tired of the whole thing and just lives in denial. I pray that he will wake up before we have to cart him off to the hospital with a serious heart attack. He really needs to shed the pounds.

There are other problems that come with diabetes. One problem is going blind. Imagine if people thought about that one for a while. Would they cut back on the massive amounts of sugar? I wonder.

My other close family member has nerve damage in his legs because of misdiagnosed diabetes. That's right the doctors got it wrong. He got big, his blood sugar went out of control, then slowly but surely the nerves in his legs died. Now he can hardly walk.

So let this be a warning to you preponderant people out there. If you have to shed some pounds, the time is now. You are getting fair warning here.

I didn't want to become diabetic. So when my third family member hit the skids, this is when I started using glucose sticks to monitor sugar in the urine. If you eat a lot of sugar then you should too. If you are preponderant you should be monitoring your blood sugar anyway. Glucose sticks are a cheap and easy way to do it. If someone turns a glucose stick brown he / she has a serious problem and should immediately see a doctor.

I deliberately avoid sugar if I can. I know that sugar is in a lot of different foods, bread included. But, I count up those calories. I watch what I eat. I didn't for a long time.

Today I woke up and weighed in at 203.8 pounds. Hurray for me!


I had a real good night of sleep. I woke up early without a clock. I felt good. I made myself a couple cups of blueberry tea. One cup had a teaspoon of honey in it (30 calories). Yep I counted that little teaspoon of honey. I had two boiled eggs (140 calories), and three thin sandwich slices of ham (105 calories).

Lunch at Denny's
I went to lunch with a friend at Denny's. I looked at all the delicious looking food on the menu. Oh I would have loved to have had the many delicious looking foods on that menu. I picked one I thought would be just the right calories. I had an egg, ham and cheese sandwich called, "Moons Over Hammy." I went to the Denny's home page to see if there was any nutritional information for this sandwich. I was surprised to see a calorie count of 841 calories. It's too late. I ate the sandwich. Over half of my calories for the day were wiped out with eating this sandwich. It was so yummy.

If I wasn't paying attention, like so many people don't, I would have eaten another big meal not realizing my impending doom.

Restaurant's like Denny's have a list of foods along with the nutritional information. I tried to get some nutritional information for Portillo's and they haven't posted any on their web site. I looked for it and I found a note that says Portillo's hasn't got any nutritional information available for it's menu items yet.

I appreciate being able to find a food item that I have eaten at some restaurant. It makes it easy for me to figure out just how many calories I have really eaten. Of course I have my little books that I look up stuff in.

I under calculated the calories for that Denny's sandwich. I was short 200 calories. Apparently there was something in the sandwich that I missed. It was a good sandwich. I liked it.

It was over half of my 1,500 calorie daily allotment of calories. Oh well, that's OK. I know what I have eaten. Go check out Denny's website and the nutritional information. I put up a link. Just click the Denny's Logo. You may be surprised just how many calories are in that stack of pancakes you plan to eat the next time you go for breakfast, or a late night snack. "Mam", said the drunk, "I'd like a stack of Flap-Jacks." (1000 calories) Bye for now.