Thursday, January 17, 2008

Who Controls You? Is It You?

Ahhhh, Ahhhh, Ahhhhh, the cats are clawing my insides. I am going to die in pain.

(This is only a dramatization, and should not be considered a real cry for help. 911 should not be called, and the FBI should not be notified to jump onto the Internet to find this persons location. The local mental hospital should not be contacted, or any authorities notified that this individual is trying to commit suicide. Remember: The above statement is only a dramatization. No persons or animals are being killed or injured.)

Hello weight losing fans...

Today I woke up hungry... I stepped up onto the Magical-Mystical-Digital-Scale weighing in at 180.4-pounds.
Yes, even at 1,300 calories my body is stubbornly hanging onto those pounds.
This is going to be a real wrestling match of my will for sure.

Well, it has only been two days now that I have cut down my caloric intake. So, what should anyone expect? Not much I think.

As, anyone can see 180-pounds is now back in sight. I don't think it is going to be to many days before I drop below 180-pounds.

A Friend Came To Visit, And Needs To Change
I have written before that no one can change anyone. No, if you are popping in on my blog today and you are seeing this one post, I am here to say, "You can't change anyone."

You know what? I can't even change myself. You can't change you.
What? I can change myself, I am in control. NO, you aren't.
Somethings in control, but it's not you.

Hey, look at your waist line. Is it thicker than it should be? Are you chucking the food into your mouth like there is no more tomorrow? Hey, I am just asking.

My friend who came to visit is around ten years younger than I am. He (If it's in God's will) has a long life that he can live. Here is the problem: He's heading for a miserable, unhealthy existence.

I mentioned God's will. First let me explain I don't mean Allah the Muslim God. I don't mean the many Buddhist, and Pantheistic gods that are out there. I mean the God that is written into the words of the Bible. I don't recognize any other god.

This isn't a class on theology, or religious belief, so I am not going to get real deep here. (One friend of mine said years ago, "There you go opening up a can of worms.")

I don't think God intended for people to get preponderant (tipping the scale in the wrong direction). I don't think God is looking at my friend and saying that it's a good idea to be 150-200-pounds over his normal body weight. I don't think God is saying hey stuff yourself and get over weight so you can sit inside a wheel chair for the rest of your adult life.

My friend has gotten overweight. He has more poundage on his body than he ought to have. He stands up around 6 foot 2 inches tall. He admitted to me that he weighs in at around 415-pounds. OUCH...

He said, "I am stable at this weight." Yeah, stable, and primed up to have a major heart attack.

According to a height weight chart that I looked in on: for his body frame, and his his height, his maximum weight ought to be 197-pounds. So, this young man is 215-pounds more than he should be.

Let me tell you what can happen to my friend:
  • One; he could suffer from an enlarged heart, which results in congestive heart failure.
  • Two; he most surely will develop Type-Two Adult Onset Diabetes.
  • Three; He could suffer a stroke from high blood pressure, and blocked arteries from the constriction of blood flow.
  • And the list goes on with the complications he could suffer.
  • Not to mention; it's hard as h...... can be to move with that much weight.
I don't live inside of my friends skin. I only live inside my own skin. I have enough to deal with in my own weird and wacky thoughts, and life.

I can't make anyone do anything they don't want to. Oh, I guess I could use threats and manipulation like the people I work with, or a neurotic boss. I could keep harping on him about his weight. I could do that. It won't change anything until he finds it inside of his heart and mind to change his habits.

Which brings me back to that Question; "Who is in control?"

One Prayer That Was Answered For Sure
When I decided to get off this extra poundage I had inside of my mind an image from many years ago. When I was in the military I was thin. With the regimen that the Army put me through I lost poundage and leaned up.

Because I was in the Military reserve for 13 more years, I was forced to maintain a certain body weight. When I left the military, things went to pot.

My motivation then was to keep the folks in the military happy. When that motivation was gone, along with it went my motivation to keep my weight down.

That's part of the story. It's all to much to write in one post.

I got fat. I was getting fatter.

Here is the difference between me, and the rest of the people out there. I was under no delusion that I had a problem. I knew I was over my normal body weight. I didn't lie to people and say this is where I should be. I wasn't telling people I am normal. It would have been a lie to say so.
And, like so many people who are delusional, I would have been perpetuating a serious problem.

I did lose hope. I did give up. I thought that there wasn't any hope for change left.
I turned to God in prayer. I confessed to God I had a serious problem that I could not fix.
Yes, I had lost weight in the past, but back it would come with a vengeance. I was regaining weight fast.

One day last year I said, "Jesus I need your strength, and wisdom to get off this weight."
Slowly the answer came. It came on Thanksgiving day when I was almost in tears when I tried to button my uniform pants and I had to suck in my gut. I tried to button my shirt and the collar squeezed the fat around my neck.
I was feeling distressed for sure.

As I was sitting sideways on the couch at a family members house I saw a television program that advertised a weight reduction program with food.
I thought, "Could it be that easy?" "Could this be it?" "Huh...?"

Not long after that I purchased a freezer full of "Lean Cuisines."
I ate those TV dinners three times a day.

From there the rest is history. Here is what I believe. God answered this one prayer. He answered it because I have no doubt that it was smack dab into the middle of his will.

I don't think it's God's will for any of us to walk around ripping out our clothes because we're fat, and getting fatter. I don't think it's God's will for us to stuff our faces and turn into balloons. I don't think it's God's will for any of us to get sick because we are out of control with our eating.

I think God will give anyone the strength he or she needs to lose weight. He says, "I give wisdom without finding fault." Why would he do such a thing? It's because when he gives the wisdom to someone he wants him/her to have an "Ah Ha moment."

God wants us to realize we can't control ourselves. We can turn to him for his control. This is what I did.

Now, is everything perfect? No it's not. This is only because I am nothing but a child living inside of an adult's body. Compared to God, I am only a child.
I cry, sneer, rage, rag, piss and moan. I am just like a child.

Bye for now...

And that's the way it is...I'm David Dane

1 comment:

A said...

When it comes time to flop off the wagon like a weak monkey, here's a good way to go: Bake Banana Bars - Recipe for Banana Bread-like Dessert.

Something like soft chocolate chip cookies with bananas mixed in.

Yum. It gets no better than that.

The downside is that when they were testing it caloric content, the calorie counting machine started to smoke, then exploded. I think your 1,300 limit might not do very well the day you snack on these little tasties.

 Hello Weight Losing Fans,  Today I stepped up onto the Digital Scale weighing in at 208.2-Pounds. My heart is very heavy with pain since my...